Growing Up? Um…

When I was younger I wanted to be a teenager so so bad. I thought they were so cool and had all of this freedom.
Now that I’m here, I want out.
It’s been very hard for me to accept lately. Just realizing that one day I’m gonna move out and start a new life with new memories, new people. Going to school for the last time and changing my daily routine is just terrifying. These are all things that I wanted so badly but the closer I get to them the less appealing they become.
I see so many adults that are just unhappy and it doesn’t make growing up seem any more exciting. I know it’s not the case for everyone but I feel like we’re all pressured to live this “ideal life.” Our goal is to go to college, settle down, get married, and have kids. I can’t bring myself to want any of those things. So many people think that this is the right way to live and if that’s the case, I don’t want it. We’re all expected to live this way but for what? To please other people? This is my life and I fear that If I dare do something different with it, I’ll be seen as unsuccessful. I’m so torn with what I want to do but I do know what I don’t want.
Growing up is the most bittersweet thing ever. Knowing that your childhood is far behind you and a new world of pressure and responsibilities is only a couple years away is scary. I want things to stay the same but growing up is just another part of life I guess.
I don’t want to come across as being negative about the future but these are just my honest thoughts. I’m not saying everyone lives this way, I just don’t want to be that person that does. Anyways, have a good rest of your day, stay safe, stay sane.